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Not My Circus, Not My Monkeys.

by Linda Thurwanger

Recently, I sent the old polish proverb, “Not my circus, not my monkeys.” in a text message, to a close friend who was struggling to maintain her inner peace in the midst of chaos.  I often recite this saying to myself as a simple reminder, that I don’t have to let the irrational behavior of others, pull […]

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Life is a Gift

by Linda Thurwanger

On this date, thirty years ago, my family gathered to celebrate my dad’s upcoming 59th birthday.  It was a Sunday afternoon and it was the last time I saw my parents and my sister Marjorie, alive.  Two days later, they were gone.   I won’t go into the tragedy surrounding their deaths or the trauma […]

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Should I tell my spouse I am thinking about divorce?

by Linda Thurwanger

  Whether or not you should let your spouse know you are thinking about divorce, depends on your individual situation and the results you expect from that confession.   You might want to ask yourself a few of these questions when trying to decide whether or not to tell your spouse your innermost thoughts about […]

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Please Don’t Feed The Dragon

by Linda Thurwanger

Is there a dragon in your life?  I’m talking about the “fire-breathing” person, whose irrational behavior makes you feel as if you have to constantly monitor your words and actions to ward off their angry outbursts?  Maybe you tell yourself it’s not a big deal because you can do whatever you have to do to […]

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Are You Ignoring An Open Window?

by Linda Thurwanger

Trying harder is not always the answer. Have you ever watched a flying insect, trapped inside your car, as it tried to escape through the windshield or the rear window?   Maybe you  rolled the side windows down, so all the bug had to do was move over a few inches and easily fly to freedom through the open window.  Instead, its wings […]

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One More Chance

by Linda Thurwanger

Are you unhappy in your marriage?  Are you waiting for your spouse to change from being uncaring, inattentive, undemonstrative and angry into someone who is attentive, loving, affectionate and peaceful?  How long have you been waiting for that to happen?  When was the last time you truly felt loved and appreciated by your spouse?  When […]

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Boundary Crashers and Bullies

by Linda Thurwanger

There are many different levels and types of abuse.  Any relationship, personal or otherwise is susceptible to it.  Sometimes, abuse is easily recognized, other times, it is more subtle.  Abuse can be intentional, or it can be unintentional.  Sometimes abusive behavior is the only way the abuser knows how to deal with their fear, anger […]

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What Love Is

by Linda Thurwanger

The quote in the image above is from Captain Corelli’s Mandolin by Louis de Bernières.  When we enter into marriage or a long-term relationship, most of us intend to develop those deep roots that the author describes.  It is why this quote is often used in wedding ceremonies. When the flame of passion begins to […]

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To Divorce Or Not To Divorce… Either Way, It Takes Courage.

by Linda Thurwanger

Between our own inner thoughts and the mixed messages we receive from our family, religious organizations and society, it is not surprising that we can feel confused about what to do when it comes to whether or not we should stay or leave a marriage. In my experience as a Divorce Coach, it seems the […]

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6 Reasons We Don’t Ask for Help

by Linda Thurwanger

We are not meant to go through hardships alone.  It troubles me that so many of us are reluctant to let others know when we are going through one of life’s challenges.  We feel good about ourselves when we help others, but when it comes to asking for emotional support for ourselves, we shy away. […]

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